sorry guys, winter depression has hit.

i don't exactly feel like doing anything at the moment. i am hoping it will pass. i hate feeling my feelings.

WTF to THIS

THIS is also the reason i couldn't do a post yesterday. THIS took out our internet service for some reason. thanks snow. I LOVE YOU!

haunting me

i am now starting to have nightmares with/about snow. nightmares. i want you to think of one of your bad dreams and then literally add lots of snow to story. this is the snow hell i am living in. it is so bad that my subconscious is saying "GET US OUTTA HERE". just another point to add to list of "things i need to speak with a therapist about". i can see it now

therapist: what is it that bothers you?

me: being a polygamist in the snow.

S.N.O.W.

It snowed. Utah is stupid. It just makes everything feel so wrong. That's all I feel like saying today. Boo.

When it rains...it pours

Poor japan. First the earthquake and then tsunami's. My thoughts are going out to all those affected by this. Stupid earthquakes and tsunami's screwing up our lives! At this moment I suppose I could be thankful I am not presently presiding on a beach. Although, this is not going to deter me from getting there on way or another.

there are no words

a note to Utah

Dear Utah,

you are just giving me more ammunition to leave you. all i ask for is when it is supposed to be spring...BE SPRING! now i know you get spring and winter confused ALOT but, really it's not that hard. YOU JUST HAVE TO BE WARMER AND NO MOTHER LOVING SNOW MMKAY?! this is also why i talk about California right to your face and my children are starting to talk about it too. yup, we have decided that California would treat us much better than you do (and Florida wouldn't hurt us either...) but seriously, if you don't pull it together soon...I AM GONNA LOSE MY MIND. and i am already a mental patient, just think how bad it would be if i went crazier. i wish i had a person to yell at about the weather (and so does my husband, he gets the biggest earful) but all i have is you. which then leads me to walking around the house yelling to the air about the cursed weather...SO STOP IT!

Marci

lather, rinse, repeat

just start lathering it over and over yourself...

YOU ARE LEAVING FOR FLORIDA IN A WEEK

YOU ARE LEAVING FOR FLORIDA IN A WEEK

YOU ARE LEAVING FOR FLORIDA IN A WEEK

then maybe rinse with a little...

YOU WILL BE GOING TO THE HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH

YOU WILL BE GOING TO THE HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH

YOU WILL BE GOING TO THE HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH

and then when in it keeps BLOODY SNOWING OVER SPRING BREAK, repeat it all over again in your mind. i am sorry, i mean MY MIND!

springtime in Utah VS Florida

(where we will be staying in a few weeks)

the longest shortest month of the year

it always starts creeping up on me in February. i tend to barely make it through January but, then February comes along and i just can't take it anymore. i hate this nasty cold weather. i hate having to bundle up my kids along with myself ANYTIME i have to go ANYWHERE out the door. i hate that it gets dark at 5:30. i start craving sunlight and warmth and the smell of grass. oh that sweet smell of grass that drafts through my open window around 5:30 when Walt is outside with Brenton mowing the lawn. February and March if you could please speed up and move along out of here, i would be ever so grateful. all of this yuckiness is starting to give me an itch to chop off my hair again. hmm. it is also around this time every year that i start making threats to my husband that i am getting in the car and driving down south (out of Utah into Cali) cause i can't live here anymore. i think it is now time to put up pictures of Florida to remind me i just have to make it until April, then we are outta here (for a week at least).

monday is here...again

since the weather has been looking like...

THIS!!!!

we have been doing alot of...

THIS!!!

i rented the wii game UP while i rented some movies for me to watch during the strep in bed moments. brenton has been playing alot of it since the weather does not want to cooperate with summertime/schools out. alas, it looks like today might be...ok. so i am now making my ME appts to get ready to go to SO CALI. i am getting my hair done tomorrow (HELLO BLONDIE). and now i have to go and call and make an appt to do...


THIS!!

yep, i get the bikini wax. i know you are all thinking... yowza, as i am too. it doesn't feel good but, it feels so much better than shaving and shaving and shaving. until tomorrow TTFN.

blame it on the rain

i have been trying to be happy on this blog.

today is not that day.

so stop reading now if you don't want to see my list of complaints.

i hate cold fronts and there is one right now that will not go away from Utah.

seriously i can't remember the last day i saw warm and hot sunlight.

the kids are out of school and i want them to play outside but...

tessa refuses to take naps anymore, or if she does it takes a year to get her down.

i have a headache.

our California getaway is not turning out to be what i thought it was going to be.

i have a headache.

i blame all of this on the rainy weather that is stuck in utah.

IT is neverending

IT just keeps coming...and coming...and coming. and just when you think that IT is going to stop and be done...IT comes again. IT is now giving me headaches and heartaches and sadness galore. i keep saying to my husband that IT and i do not get along and every year our fights are getting worse and worse. the IT and i cannot survive with eachother, i do not understand the IT and IT does not understand me. if IT did understand me IT would have left me alone now!

i should be driving around in my car with my windows down listening to

him above and him below

we are now in talks of getting somewhere where we can do some of THIS.

PS the him's are G Love and Jack Johnson (in case you didn't know)

What the...

you all knew this post was a comin today, right?! well here it is ...

How can the weather be like THIS...

when we were doing THIS on Friday (B man was off looking at the tigers somewhere so he missed the picture op)? How i ask you, How??? I am afraid my husband is going to come home to a wife who has packed up a suitcase full of shorts, t shirts, and swimming suits. She will then start raving like a mad woman "i am packing up the car and am driving south until i hit the warm weather, call the kids school and tell them we are gone!!". Sadly, this has REALLY happened before, you can ask my husband. RUFS...OUT!!

monday...deja vu!!!

i was going to do a post today about how happy i am that the time has changed. more sunlight later in the day, which means i am happier. but...i am not going to talk about it. why???? because there is no sunlight to celebrate today. it is cold. it is gray and cloudy. there are a few random snowflakes falling. i am not happy. maybe tomorrow i can talk about the sunshine...then again, maybe not (this is UTAH, spring doesn't really exist...yep, the first day of spring is supposed to be on March 20).

monday...dark and dreary

i have a hard time dealing with life on mondays...then, you have to add dark clouds to it. I AM TOAST. i don't know why i have to have these feelings when there is no sunlight? i think i have bad chemicals in my brain (name that movie molly). but really i kinda feel that way a little. today i woke up and looked out my front door and saw this...
when i see this, for some reason i just sense doom and gloom. there is no rhyme or reason to it...i just feel it. this then leads to anxiety issues...i start to think about what bad things are going to happen today because it looks so very sad outside (this is why i need to see my dr about getting my anxiety meds refilled). so all day today i have felt this way and i just can't think or rationalize my way out of it. i NEED THE SUNLIGHT.

last night over at my parents house i was up in the kitchen with my sister molly. someone changed to the channel of the tv downstairs and all molly had to hear was a millisecond of the movie and she yells "who's watching LORD OF THE RINGS?". i looked at her and said "how do you know that?". she then said "if i got that right...then that is really sad". i looked at the tv and sure enough she was right...which can only mean, molly is really sad (you should do a post about your obsession mo).

this got me thinking about light and dark. the evil is always surrounded by the dark ominous clouds and when the good comes to fight there is always light with it. I LOVE THE LIGHT AND THE FEELING IT GIVES YOU. i love that light can ALWAYS overcome the darkness. i love these movies and how happy they make you when the good overcomes the evil.

on another note my kylee and brenton kept trying to watch this on the tv. i think it is still a little too scary for them. they keep trying to convince me otherwise...just like THE DARK KNIGHT battle i have with brenton.